As a young girl, I remember playing dress-up, pretending to get married. My friends or their younger siblings — it was a bonus if they had a little brother — would be forced to play the groom, because in our make-believe fantasies, everything had to be 100% accurate.
Once I got out of my dress-up stage, I began getting more serious with my plans. I wanted to get married outside in the summer so I still had a great natural tan. I wanted a bouquet of colorful flowers. I wasn’t specific to the kind; all I knew was that everything needed to be bright, a beautiful contrast to my golden hair that would be perfectly curled over my shoulders.
Along with having the perfect groom, I would have my perfect girls — my best friends, my non-biological sisters. My bridesmaids would be standing beside me subtly crying as I walked the aisle toward the man of my dreams. They would be just as beautiful as I was, wearing sun dresses of various colors with flowers in their hair. I would have hints of their dress colors in my bouquet as well.
Because the wedding would be outside, they would also be barefoot. (Hey, cut me a break. I was around 10 at this point in the planning and grew up playing with my boy cousins in the country hills of Teoc. Barefoot was all I knew.)
You would be happy to learn, however, that a majority of my 10-year-old wedding plans did
not make their way into the actual event. When it came time to start planning my wedding, my bridesmaids and their dresses were among the details about which I was most excited.
I knew immediately I didn’t want perfect symmetry. I didn’t want them to all look the same. Instead, I wanted all of my girls to stand out in their own way. Even though this day was dedicated to the love between my husband and me, I wanted to honor the women who had taken me in and loved me, some even long before I knew my husband.
I considered going with a multi-colored palate for the wedding, but, honestly, that was more work than this ultra-low-maintenance bride wanted to deal with. So, instead, I decided the color I wanted my girls in, and then let them choose their own dresses. We loaded the car one Saturday morning and headed for David’s Bridal in Southaven. Immediately after I found my perfect dress, my girls began roaming the shop for their perfect dresses, as well.
Dresses, like bridesmaids, are not one-size-fits-all. By letting the bridesmaids choose their own styles of dresses, they were able to pick ones that best suited their body types.
When I gave my bridesmaids the freedom to choose their own dresses, I not only had a unique variety among how my bridesmaids looked, but they then felt more comfortable and confident with themselves throughout the wedding day.
Dresses, like bridesmaids, are not one-size-fits-all. By letting my girls choose their dresses, they were able to pick those that best suited their body types. For example, if there were parts of their bodies they were less comfortable with being exposed, they had the choice to have that extra coverage in their dresses.
This was one of the perks of choosing her own dress, according to one of my bridesmaids, Anna Mills.
“I absolutely loved this idea,” Mills said. “Every body type is different, and a single dress may not fit everyone the same. We know the wedding day isn’t about us as bridesmaids, but I think it’s important to feel your best in the dress you are wearing.”
Another one of my bridesmaids, Jerrika Goss, also enjoyed choosing her dress because this gave her and the other bridesmaids the opportunity to express their own styles.
“I loved the idea of choosing my own dress because I was able to find something I felt comfortable in that fit my body type better,” said Goss. “I also really liked being able to see everyone’s personality through her dress choice. We didn’t all just walk in a line in the same dress. You got to see each individual’s style based on what they chose to wear.”
Having variety in bridesmaids’ dresses has become popular in recent weddings. Apart from my own, I have been in four weddings. Of the four, three brides gave us bridesmaids the option to choose our dresses. One of the brides, Grayson King, agreed with my reasoning to let the bridesmaids each wear the dress of their choice. However, instead of absolutely free rein, she selected a few dresses for the girls to choose from.
“I chose four styles of dresses that I liked, all the same color, and let my bridesmaids choose which dress they wanted from those styles,” she said. “I wanted them to be comfortable and like the style they were picking, since everyone is so different.”
For her wedding, Grayson King chose four styles of dresses for her bridesmaids to pick from. “I wanted them to be comfortable and like the style they were picking, since everyone is so different,” she said.
To King, it did not matter if more than one bridesmaid chose the same dress as another; she was more worried about her bridesmaids’ comfort. If two bridesmaids liked the same dress, she was more than OK with having that style multiple times in the wedding party.
For another bride, Aubrey Ramer, the prices of the dresses played a role in the options presented to us bridesmaids.
“My bridesmaids were given about five different options of dress styles and price ranges to choose from,” Ramer said. “This way, they were able to pick the one that was most suited to their liking and also in their price range.”
How a bride chooses to do any part of her wedding is completely up to her and will vary with each person.
Looking back, I’m still satisfied with my bridesmaids’ dresses. Not only do the dresses look unique when put together in pictures, but it makes me happy knowing my girls felt beautiful and comfortable throughout the day, as well.
- This article first appeared in Leflore Illustrated, a quarterly magazine published by The Greenwood Commonwealth.
