For couples with spring wedding dates, this time of year should be filled with joy, excitement and pre-nuptial festivities and fun.
Because of the coronavirus pandemic and national restrictions on gatherings of more than 10 people, most soon-to-be brides and grooms are feeling quite a bit of anxiety. Couples are being forced to make a tough decision about their weddings — postpone until a later date, go ahead with a much smaller ceremony or make a trip to city hall.
For Dr. Baker Boler and his wife, Lauren, March 28 did not go as planned. The two were set to exchange vows at St. Alphonsus Catholic Church in Ocean Springs, the bride’s hometown.
Boler, a 2008 graduate of Pillow Academy who works as a hospitalist at Greenwood Leflore Hospital, said early in March was when one by one the couple’s yearlong wedding plans slowly began to fall apart.
“I think the first thing, Italy or Spain had an outbreak, and we had already planned a honeymoon to Portugal and Spain,” said Boler.
That’s when President Donald Trump announced a travel ban to Europe.
“So we had to cancel our honeymoon and call the hotels and airline,” he said.
Shortly after, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention announced guidelines to stop large gatherings of more than 250 people. Then, that number dropped to no more than 50.
“I think about two weeks before the wedding it changed to no groups of 10 or more,” said Boler.
The couple initially expected about 250 people to attend the wedding.
Earlier in March, “We were thinking we could have the bridesmaids and groomsmen come, like a group of 50,” said Boler. “But eventually in a stepwise process leading up to the wedding, everything was taken away.”
The beaches were being closed in Ocean Springs, and that’s when the couple made the decision to move their wedding to Jackson, where they had recently bought a house to reside as newlyweds.
The couple married at St. Richard’s Catholic Church with a group of 10, which included the priest and the photographer. Both sets of parents attended, along with the bride’s sister and brother-in-law.
The couple had planned this day for a year, had everything ready, including customized drink huggies and cups.
Boler said they had thought about postponing, but “there’s so much uncertainty. That’s why we decided to go ahead and do it and have a small wedding, and it was real nice.” They also took into consideration that Boler begins a cardiology fellowship in July at the University of Mississippi Medical Center, which is also where Lauren works as a critical care nurse.
The bride and groom got all dressed up — Boler in his tux and his now wife in her wedding dress with her hair and makeup provided by a professional.
As the newlyweds left the church, Boler said his sister and her husband and their three daughters were outside in their truck, and the three girls were blowing bubbles from the truck.
The small wedding party got together after the ceremony and shared a meal at the couple’s new home.
“It was real nice,” said Boler.
Family and friends made the day even more special. They sent videos of well wishes, wedding advice, words of encouragement and toasts that would have been made, many of them humorous.
Boler’s brother, Michael, made an almost 10-minute long video, which included what would have been his rehearsal dinner speech. It also featured his sons Teddy, 4, and George, 2, as ring bearers walking down a makeshift aisle lined with patio chairs filled with stuffed animals. His wife, Claire, also provides well wishes to the couple, and the video is capped with the family of four having a dance party, similar to what the reception would have been like.
“In this age of technology, everybody was really supportive of us,” Boler said.
For engaged couple Carter McNeer and Clay Perry, they should be feeling the excitement and anticipation of their quickly approaching wedding day, which was originally set for April 18. But earlier this week, they had to make a tough call when the president announced Monday the new “30 Days to Slow the Spread” guidelines, which doesn’t end until April 30.
“We had to move it to a later date,” said McNeer. “We had to make the decision together. But in the end, we were just like this is something we’ve wanted our whole lives, and we want all of our family and friends to be there.”
The couple got engaged in March 2019 and have been planning their wedding for a little more than a year. They sent out 500 invitations and were expecting a large crowd to celebrate with them on their big day.
“Everything was planned,” said McNeer.
McNeer, a registered nurse in the Emergency Department at Greenwood Leflore Hospital, said she was upset about having to postpone the wedding.
But added, “I’ve seen firsthand how terrible this virus is, and it’s affecting everybody in one way or another.”
With events being postponed now, the couple received emails from their wedding vendors with available rescheduling dates to select from, or else lose the money they had already spent.
“Luckily, every single one of our vendors and our venue had July 4 available,” said McNeer. “Even though that’s a big travel time for people, it’s the best thing we could hope for because we didn’t lose any money.”
So now they have a Fourth of July wedding date set.
McNeer said she had chosen April 18 “from the beginning, so I had become really attached to it.”
She had never thought about having her wedding on July 4, but she and Perry both love celebrating the holiday and America.
“One thing that we could never decide about was the light-up accessories to have on the dance floor at our wedding,” McNeer said. “So when we did this, we said, ‘Well, we can do a red, white and blue theme.’
“So it kind of worked out in that way, and I just feel like it was a sign from God that this is what was supposed to happen.”
For McNeer and Perry, although they are disappointed about postponing their wedding, the most important thing to the couple is celebrating their love for each other with their family and friends.
“I just knew at the end of the day I was going to get to marry him either way. It doesn’t really matter what day,” said McNeer. “If I had to wait a whole other year, I would do it, because he’s the love of my life, and it’s worth the wait.”
Nichole Henry and Taylor Buchanan, both of Greenwood, are getting married on Nov. 7, but with all of the uncertainty now, they have temporarily paused their nuptial-day planning.
“It’s still on, but a lot is just up in the air,” said Henry. “We just have no idea if this is still going to be a thing, because that’s the rough part about it. We have no idea how long this could last.”
Before the coronavirus pandemic hit Leflore County, they had their flowers set, bridesmaids dresses picked and were in the middle of working on their invitations list.
Henry said she can’t really do a lot of planning right now, because the size of the wedding will affect a lot of the details, such as the size of the cake. Planning a wedding with 100 to 150 guests is different from planning a wedding consisting of a maximum of 10 people.
“I have no idea. If it’s a small wedding, that changes everything,” she said.
Most brides in the midst of planning a wedding feel some anxiety. Planning the big day during a pandemic, however, “just kind of adds to it,” said Henry.
Even if a worst-case scenario does occur and large gatherings continue to be restricted by the time the couple’s wedding day approaches, Henry and Buchanan are still looking forward to exchanging vows, regardless of the day of the week or the venue.
“I love Taylor, and Taylor loves me. If we have to get married at the courthouse and do a big shindig later, that’s fine,” said Henry. “If worse comes to worse, we’ll go down to city hall, or if the date has to change, it has to change. We’ll be alright.”
• Contact Ruthie Robison at 581-7235 or rrobison@gwcommonwealth.com.
